Ladies and Gentlemen, and if I may, especially the ladies (he said uncomfortably). We here at the Dudeletter are much like you, that is why you like us. So, when I say that I am done with these song, I believe you feel the same way. These songs are not only good, but often they are great! However, it doesn’t matter if it is 97.1 F.M. the River, a High School Dance, or a baseball game loud speaker; these songs are everywhere. They are like a horrible addiction.
1. Van Morrison – Brown Eyed Girl
I get it, she is your brown eyed girl. For the love of God, could they break up? I mean Jesus. I wish a better song of his caught on.
2. Lynyrd Skynyrd – Sweet Home Alabama
You know what makes a great song better? Making up your own words in the guitar parts! Awesome! Thanks sorority girls of the South!
Ok, so this could be anything by Styx. Renegade, Lady, with the possible exception of Come Sail Away. Damn 80’s big sound music.
If you caught this song in the middle, could you tell it from any other song? This is possibly the most generic rock song of the last 30 years. This is incredible, how could you as an arena band, make a song that sounds like it could be by anyone? It is impressively bad.
5. Ozzy Osbourne – Crazy Train
Ok, guess what? This song has lyrics! Sweet Jesus! “I’m going off the rails on a crazy train!” Whether you are Chipper Jones or merely one of his love children, guess what you are sick of this song and so am I. The guitar is incredible, but man, there has to be at least one other person with a whammy bar.
Dear Classic Rock Stations,
Love the Dudeletter.